Marriage Ministry

The Marriage Ministry Team at Naperville Presbyterian Church provides care and support for premarital and married couples. The team provides education regarding marital communication and intimacy, and will, on request, provide support and mentoring to couples looking to build a biblical marriage, or couples who may be in distress, or simply have questions about the marriage relationship. This team consists of lay leaders, staff and pastors who together strive for Christ-centered, biblically rooted marriages.

Your Wedding at NPC

As you prepare for your wedding at Naperville Presbyterian Church, please contact:

• The pastor (*Email: NateConrad or ChrisHodge) you wish to perform your wedding service at 630-961-0579 in order to discuss and coordinate numerous issues including availability, content and prerequisites.
• Lew and Dottye Luttrell (*Email: MarriageCounseling) to arrange premarital counseling. Couples will meet with one of the members of the Marriage Team. The team uses the Prepare-Enrich Program to help identify and address a couple's relational strengths and growth areas.
• The church office at 630-961-0579 to check on availability and reserve the facilities for your use. At this time, the church is available for use by members only.
• The NPC Wedding Coordinator, Jamie Sonnenschein (*Email: Weddings) will assist you with various details in preparing for the wedding service.

*All email addresses are @npchurch.org

Premarital Process

Naperville Presbyterian Church has developed a premarital process that we believe will help you prepare, not only for your wedding, but also for a life-long marriage that gives joy to you and glory to God.
 
We recognize the investment of time required for premarital counseling; however, we believe the time spent developing skills and exploring and discussing issues now will continue to pay dividends in improved communications and your relationship as husband and wife until "death do you part".
 
The premarital process at Naperville Presbyterian Church generally includes the following steps:

• Preliminary meeting with one of the church’s pastors. Some of the topics that are likely to be discussed during this meeting are:
  

  • How the two of you met and fell in love
  • Your spiritual life
  • Your previous relational and marital experience
  • Any special concerns you may have
  • Recommended readings during this premarital process
  • The date, time, and location of the service

• Pre-marital Mentoring: Having met with one of the pastors, you will begin meeting with trained pre-marital counselors (mentors) who will walk with you through the counseling process.

• Assessment: Prior to your first meeting with your pre-marital counselors, you will be provided with instructions by e-mail on how to login and complete a confidential, customized, on-line couple assessment instrument (Prepare) which is designed to identify a couple's area of strength and potential growth that might be helpful to discuss in future meetings. There are no right or wrong answers. It is intended to help you see yourself, your intended spouse, and your relationship more clearly.
  

  • There is a $30 per couple fee for the computerized scoring and comparison of the results. This fee will be payable by credit card by the first person to login for the assessment. There is no other charge for the pre-marital process.
  • Based on your assessment results, you can expect to meet with your mentors a number of times during which they will help you to discuss and understand your results and to learn and practice some proven relationship skills. The number of these meetings is dependent on you, the results of the instrument, and the length and productivity of the meetings. The common experience has run between four and eight meetings.
  • The results of this instrument may be shared with the pastor and/or pastoral care counselor who may be consulted and who may be invited to join in one or more of the meetings with your mentors.

• Follow-up: In some cases, you may desire, or your mentors may recommend additional meetings with members of our ministry staff who are trained in a variety of areas to encourage your marriage, or to continue discussing what you have learned as a couple during the time.
  

  • A trained budget coach at NPC to more thoroughly address stewardship issues and difficulties in budgeting, mutual financial cooperation and submission, biblical principles of joint stewardship, and debt management and repayment.
  • Upon completion of the feedback process, you will again schedule one or more meetings with your pastor to discuss what you have learned and to finalize the plans for your wedding.
  • We would anticipate three additional meetings with your mentoring couple, at approximately four months, seven months, and twelve months after your wedding. At these meeting, you will discuss your marital experience to date and address any questions or problems you may have encountered along the way.

This process is intended to give you the opportunity for a thoughtful and thorough examination of yourselves and your relationship in order to identify your relational strengths and address potential growth areas before they become problems.

Ongoing Marriage Support

We offer classes, mentoring and/or counseling for those wishing to improve their marriage:

• Recommended marriage resources: books, DVDs, websites, blogs
• Audio from the 2007 Sonship Marriage Retreat Conference is posted here for download.
• The Marriage Ministry team, including counselors, mentors and pastors are available to meet on a semi-regular basis for encouragement, teaching, care and prayer.
• Through the year, NPC provides classes, retreats, and other events that can encourage married couples of all ages.
• Mentoring: We encourage couples to meet regularly with a married couple in Naperville Presbyterian Church who are willing to share their experience and life lessons with you and help you to explore and discuss issues and areas in your lives that are likely to influence the course of your marriage.  The issues might include such areas as your attitude toward sexuality, children, gender roles, communication, household responsibilities and finances.  Your mentors will be trained prepare/enrich facilitators.
  
  • Your mentor pairing will be based on such factors as availability, scheduling, location, personal preference and pastoral discernment.
  • Your relationship with your mentors will be developed during a number of informal meetings.  You will have the responsibility of scheduling these meetings with your mentors.

We look forward to your wedding day, and even more to your joyful, life-long, God-honoring marriage. If you have any questions please contact *Email: JackKelly, Director of Care & Counseling, or *Email: NateConrad at Naperville Presbyterian Church 630-961-0579.

*All Email addresses are @npchurch.org